On Wednesday afternoon, sheriff's deputies went to a house in Castro Valley, California for a "probation compliance" check. And they found that, no, 32-year-old Assif Mayar was NOT complying with his probation.
--Inside the house, police found 34 pounds of dried, processed marijuana. But they couldn't get to it right away, because it was inside a Plexiglas tank . . . being guarded by an ALLIGATOR.
--The alligator was FIVE FEET long. Assif told the cops the gator's name is Mr. Teeth . . . and Assif bought him in 1996, quote, "to commemorate the death of TUPAC SHAKUR."
--We're not exactly sure how buying a marijuana-guarding alligator and naming him Mr. Teeth honors Tupac. Perhaps just pouring a little bit out of a 40 would've sufficed? But I guess we all grieved for Tupac differently.
--Assif was arrested for possessing marijuana for sale. Mr. Teeth was taken to the Oakland Zoo where he's being treated for some serious health problems.